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I really enjoy acupuncture – so much so, that I look forward to it every 2 weeks. After all, it’s downright cured me of a number of issues including chronic migraines, acid reflux, and most recently, seasonal allergies. But I also continue to go because it helps me deal with those every-day stresses.

But it almost seems to unbalance the stress scales when I drive to my acupuncture treatment. And don’t even get me started when there is a Phillies game, or a concert, or anything that totally mucks up traffic on all roadways within a 25-mile radius! By the time I get to my appointment (and late, I might add) I must look to them like an apoplectic mess, shivering with rage, and ready to bitch-slap anyone who looks at me sideways.

Recently I experienced this traffic mucking once again. It was a deluge of stupidity!

One of the worst things is something I seem to see the most of in Pennsylvania (I’d love to hear if this happens in other states, too, but I’ve not seen it) and is alone worthy of throwing me into an apoplectic seizure. You know when you’re driving along a road, or a highway, which has 2 or more lanes, and one of the lanes is closed? You’ll see a sign that reads, “Left Lane Closed 1 Mile Ahead,” and immediately past that sign drivers are quickly shifting to the right lane like there’s a disease on the left shoulder. Rather than contributing to the traffic jam that will then grow to a 2 mile lane of drivers parked in the right lane, I continue on in the left lane, figuring I’ll just drive up to where the merge is – THEN I’ll merge into the right lane with the rest of the traffic.

Well, that is until someone either in the right lane who sees me driving along in the left lane through their side-view mirror – or someone in front of me who decides it’s too risky – pulls their car mid-way between both lanes so as to cut off anyone from getting in front of them.

People!! This is why there is a specific point at which you merge, and it’s clearly marked out for you so you don’t have to guess!! Consider doing it like adults who know better than children! Even children are taught how to share space and take turns: One car from the left; one car from the right; one car from the left; one car from the right; keep repeating!!

I swear, you can really tell which drivers never learned how to play well with others in the same sandbox!! GET OUT OF MY WAY!!

Then I finally get to my appointment…

Receptionist: Oh my goodness! Curious Bloke!
Curious Bloke: Whtthfckjsthppndtthrnthrd?? I’mgngtsmckthshtttathsppl!!
Receptionist: Why is your face twitching like that??

By the time I leave my appointment, however,I have that new-found feeling of peace and tranquility.

Well… until the drive home.

At least my partner was willing to do the home. If nothing more, between that and the acupuncture, at least it kept me out of prison – something else acupuncture is good for!

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