Hot Guy

[This is a recycled post. Not a re-post. There’s a difference. They’re spelled differently. But this one was so old, I doubt anyone even remembers it in the first place. So it’s almost like its new, isn’t it? Oh! And the picture above has absolutely nothing to do with the post. But it sure is nice to look at, isn’t it?]

I recently visited with some friends out of town. Whenever we get together, we always have a great time, even if it’s just sitting around and catching up. Normally, we don’t have much in the line of excitement happening when we visit. Our excitement is gossiping about what’s been happening in each of our lives, how it’s affecting the rest of us, and finding good places to eat. But this weekend held a more interesting topic: Bats.

As we were preparing to decide which of the wonderful restaurants we wanted to sample in the area, Hubby and I were sitting in the living room discussing our options. Roberto was in the kitchen getting himself ready for the evening, and Carlos was in the dining room sharing conversations between the kitchen and the living room. We’d finally made a decision to eat in, because Roberto and Carlos are fabulous cooks, and we simply couldn’t resist what they had planned out for us. (And it was delicious!)

Hubby and I got our asses out of the comfy chairs and started walking into the kitchen when Hubby happened to look up and noticed a large brown spot on the wall near the ceiling over the fireplace. Not remembering whether he’d noticed this new decoration before, he looked closer to better admire it and noticed it was not only a brown lump, but it was also fuzzy. With little claws. And a little face. Realizing this was not a new wall ornament, but rather a bat, he shrieked with a high-pitched scream that only gay men can accomplish, while running through the downstairs rooms with his arms flailing like Macaulay Culkin in Home Alone.

Upon hearing the blood-curdling scream, the bat woke up, dislodged itself, and began flapping around the rooms trying to find a way out. Thinking quickly, I grabbed the first thing I could think to throw at the bat – a pillow from the sofa – to knock him down in mid-flight so we could properly catch him. As the pillow went flying in slow motion, I saw it heading toward the ceramic adornments on the fireplace mantle, and realized it was probably not a good idea.

Just at that point, Roberto came running into the living room, wielding a broom, swinging it furiously with his eyes closed. The rest of us were running around the room just trying not to get swatted with the broom, or bitten by the bat (which we knew just had to be a vampire bat!). The sound of things breaking and smashing were everywhere. I was grabbing anything I could get my hands on to throw at the beast, Hubby was still squealing and running in circles, and Carlos was running around with a plastic container and lid trying to catch it in mid-flight.

Carlos finally caught it in a miraculous grand jeté (look it up) across the living room and continued with a few pirouettes to the back door, releasing the evil beast into the wild.

Well, that’s how it could have played out. Instead, no one was running around screaming, brooms weren’t hoisted, the bat wasn’t flying around, and no one knew ballet. It was actually a very quiet episode where the bat was quickly and quietly trapped in a container and let loose out the back door without further event.

But gosh, wasn’t the other story more interesting?